The last time I cried was at the Portland airport, saying goodbye. And I really cried. And I thought this year would be a roller coaster of emotions... but I guess I forgot that I'm really not an emotional person. I forgot that whatever the transition is, I kind of just go with it. So while I'm a little disappointed in missing out on my emotionally challenging year, it also comes as no surprise.
But last night as I thought about leaving here, i cried. And it's not that I'm not really, really excited to go home and see everyone. And it's not that I don't miss my family and friends like crazy. But as I thought about this year, all of the experiences, good and bad, and friendships, I cried thinking of it all being over.
And even if I stayed, everything would be different... 90% of my friends are leaving.
And it's not like I could recreate this year... people have already left.
And 3 weeks are going to be gone in the blink of an eye.
And right now I'm just sad about that. Later I'll be grateful, but right now I'm sad.
Monday, June 12, 2006
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
Sorry kid....but I am glad you had a good year, met some great friends, and had fun...along with the hard stuff. Life is just one big BYE and HELLO!! And that is the hard part...BUT it is also the GREAT part...just come by and see our WALL of FAME..so many people that we call friends...and they are ALL OVER this fantastic Globe...Bekah, you have become Global..and that is a good thing!! Filled with a lining of sorrow!!
ah yes. once again saying goodbye. it is what i have hated the most about this temporary place. the good thing is that i know i will see you again soon, and alot of the others that i have met. but still doesnt make this place easier - and i love it here so much. but most people come here saying only a year. so anyway - gonna be a quick few weeks. but for me - as you know - isnt such a bad thing. but yes - you will be missed.
but pete - you know that bekah doesnt drink beer! drinking beer is bad!!! :)
Hey Bekah...
I remember when I left Alaska I cried all the way from Seattle to Medford. I spent the whole plane trip looking out the window so that no one would see me. :o) (I wonder what I would have done if I had an aisle seat) I think it's a normal part of leaving a place where you've stayed for an extended period. You miss the people you've met etc. Anyway, I'll keep you in prayer. Looking forward to seeing you again soon...
Sean
Hey Beks. thanks for being real for the whole world to read. :-) I know you can cry... you just reserve it for special times and special memories. like saying goodbye to a chapter of life. remember the whole chapter analogy you gave me when I wanted to say it was season... I still think it is a season but for you... chapters my dear.. just chapters... :) love you tons!!!!!
geez Beks, get a grip. HA! kidding of course. transitions suck. love ya!
Oh Beks, crying is so not overrated. Just let it flow, especially since you don't do it very often. Sometimes I just cry for no reason (maybe it's stress). We love you, tears and all. And as you can see, everyone understands that change is hard even if it isn't good or bad, just sort of neutral. Now what would be bad is if you came home and went back to the old Bekah, pre-Prague (even though we do love the pre-Prague Beks, she wouldn't have as many fun stories and pictures to show us). Even though the chapter is closing on your time in Prague you still have learned a lot and all those lessons must now filter into the chapters to come (I like this chapter business).
Anyways (blah blah blah from Tabitha), I was just think last night how things are going to change around here when you get back. It made me so excited to have you back in our time zone, especially since we are losing another leafie. We were planning her little pre-wedding party and got all excited when we could put your name down on the list of people to invite since you will be here!! yay! Love you girl, can't wait to see you in three weeks!
(sorry this was so long, probably should have just emailed you, oh well)
Post a Comment